Change is good again.
Tuesday, August 27, 2013
Leaving Bad Behind
Everyone knows that at some point in time things end. Life is cyclical; beginnings lead to ends that lead to new beginnings, over and over again for infinitesimal time. You cannot stay static in this world, as everything is always changing and moving all the time in this physical plane of our existence. That being said, there are times when change must wait. So I waited. And waited. And waited. But I cannot wait anymore. The time for change is here, and I know what once was must come to an end. For the last two years I've endured the difficult times my entire family faced with sensibility, responsibility, and an almost brave face. I did the best I could to delay the inevitable collapse of the stability I was trying so hard to create in the face of utter chaos which I had been enveloped in for so long. But I cannot delay my change any longer; it's either risk a loss in my life or have no life at all. At this moment in time I've already made my decision to change as I am finally ready to do so, and I stick by it. For some I may have bided my time for too long, but I had to be sure I was making the right decision. Now I am 100% sure of myself, so I am leaving. I am actively embracing change and leaving a bad situation for a better one. I'd much rather brave a bright path of uncertainty with a good chance of success than go through a rushing river of stagnation and guaranteed discontent and wasted time. I just can't have that. For the last two years I have been stuck in a bad situation with my family that I needed to be involved it. At the beginning I chose to stay and help out, but as the situation evolved my choice was taken away from me. I no longer had the choice to stay for I didn't have the choice to leave. My family needed my help so I helped. I wanted to help, but then my help was take for granted and expected. It wasn't "could you", it was "do it" and I'm totally fed up. I did many things over the last two years, many times with no recognition, no satisfaction, no gratitude, and never any compensation for my time or effort. Not that I expected money, not at all, but being in my late 20's and having to rely on my father to support me for two years did nothing to make me feel confident or like an adult. I need freedom, I need to be able to choose, and the only way I can do that is to leave. I really needed freedom over the last two years, but family obligations put a damper on everything I wanted to do. I felt trapped, unable to breathe, stuck in a bad situation that made me feel empty and angry. I was a bottle under pressure from the inside out. It killed me everyday for the last two years, and now it's over. I've freed myself from a bonded life, and I'm leaving it behind with no regrets.
Friday, June 21, 2013
Sunny Summer Solstice
Today we've reached the midpoint of the year- the height of the Oak King and frolicking fairies in green, lush fields and verdant forest groves. The sun is out shining bright in the afternoon sky, with the wind swaying much greenery and flowers in its breeze. To say I'm content right now is an understatement; life has been good to me as of late, and despite having moments of sadness I am thankful.
I was recently able to see my boyfriend after a long time of being apart, and honestly it was a time of happiness long overdue for the both of us. We spent two weeks together traveling on the east coast, and it was magical. Despite my anxiety over certain things our relationship is more solid than ever. I suppose being in love does that to people.
This summer solstice has not been particularly special- really just another sunny, warm day in June. But there is hope and love in the air I'm breathing. The feelings and emotions I've been turning over and over in my mind are brimming with new life and teeming with excitement. Half of the year has gone, and I'm very much looking forward for the rest that is to come.
Blessed Litha, everyone xoxox
Wednesday, April 24, 2013
Thoughts on Observing Esbats
(Taken from my Book of Shadows)
It's been quite a while since I last wrote in my BOS, and I have missed the peace that comes with writing in this little black journal of mine from time to time.
Last night I had what I guess you could call an "interlude" between the more mundane parts of my day. I knew the moon was heading towards being full, in it's 'waxing' phase, so I felt drawn to sitting on the green couch in front of the windows and pulled up the blinds to look at the moon. It was just past midnight with the moon at the peak in the night sky. The moon was so bright, the streetlight in front of the house paled in comparison. I say staring at the moon for quite some time. It's funny how staring at the moon seems to solve all of my problems. Perhaps it's the reverent solitude, or the wisdom that comes from knowing you are looking at the same moon every single one of your ancestors and their ancestors, all the way to the dawn of time, also looked at all those centuries and millennia ago.
After that brief moment of silent awe, I realized that I've been back in my habit of focusing too much on the material as if late, and ignoring what I should never put aside. The spirit, my spirit, is a delicate thing, and I need to be actively engaged in this to truly find peace in myself.
I have made a pledge to observe all the next Esbats in May and the end of April to bring myself back into the swing of things, and so far I have planned for one tomorrow night, the full moon of April 24th.
I am convinced that celebrating the course of the moon during its 28 day cycle is very important to the witch's cause and well-being. The moon opens up the mind and gives us time to pause and reflect upon ourselves and our actions. The moon helps us understand the cycles within our own lives and our feminine wisdom that has been inherent to us as women (and men!) and passed down from our female ancestors.
So a toast to esbats and the moon herself, and to all of the witches and lovers of the moon. May we all be safe and free to frolic in her moonlight for many years to come.
It's been quite a while since I last wrote in my BOS, and I have missed the peace that comes with writing in this little black journal of mine from time to time.
Last night I had what I guess you could call an "interlude" between the more mundane parts of my day. I knew the moon was heading towards being full, in it's 'waxing' phase, so I felt drawn to sitting on the green couch in front of the windows and pulled up the blinds to look at the moon. It was just past midnight with the moon at the peak in the night sky. The moon was so bright, the streetlight in front of the house paled in comparison. I say staring at the moon for quite some time. It's funny how staring at the moon seems to solve all of my problems. Perhaps it's the reverent solitude, or the wisdom that comes from knowing you are looking at the same moon every single one of your ancestors and their ancestors, all the way to the dawn of time, also looked at all those centuries and millennia ago.
After that brief moment of silent awe, I realized that I've been back in my habit of focusing too much on the material as if late, and ignoring what I should never put aside. The spirit, my spirit, is a delicate thing, and I need to be actively engaged in this to truly find peace in myself.
I have made a pledge to observe all the next Esbats in May and the end of April to bring myself back into the swing of things, and so far I have planned for one tomorrow night, the full moon of April 24th.
I am convinced that celebrating the course of the moon during its 28 day cycle is very important to the witch's cause and well-being. The moon opens up the mind and gives us time to pause and reflect upon ourselves and our actions. The moon helps us understand the cycles within our own lives and our feminine wisdom that has been inherent to us as women (and men!) and passed down from our female ancestors.
So a toast to esbats and the moon herself, and to all of the witches and lovers of the moon. May we all be safe and free to frolic in her moonlight for many years to come.
Friday, April 12, 2013
Major Arcana: The High Priestess
The ever-loved and much pondered High Priestess card does not tread lightly in meaning nor suggestion. The most apt paraphrasing of the exact meaning of this card would be, "as within, so without." Despite that sounding like an extremely general statement, the phrase does fulfill all the necessary requirements to understand the subtle meaning contained in this card.
As most of us know from studying the ancient cultures of Western Civilization, priestesses were women that devoted their lives to the gods and goddesses of yore with vows to their sacred temples. Mostly young women, they were the ancient diviners and oracles of which cult followers and Homeric-type poets adored and made legendary. Those women gave their energies to their cause with grace, dignity, and of their own free will.
The way I see it, the High Priestess in the Tarot is just as enigmatic as the temple-women of ancient times before her. An opposite and compliment to the Magician, she beckons us within our readings to look inside ourselves and reflect upon the answers we already have, feed our inner spirit, and feel the energies of the world around us in our contemplative state. This is a card of passiveness as opposed to action; to dwell in the mental subconscious instead of acting in the physical.
It is hard to say more about this card as to me it is more about feeling than seeing. If seeing is believing, could not feeling be understood as knowing? That is the message the High Priestess conveys to me.
Wednesday, March 20, 2013
Ostara 2013
Amidst yet another long and heavy snowfall came the Spring Equinox to Montreal. I wasn't the least bit surprised.
Now that the most recent snow piles have begun to melt under the strong sunlight of the longer days, things feel a bit lighter than they were during the winter months. Energies are rising and harkening life back to earth, and people are starting to put away their sweaters in favour of t-shirts. Flip-flop season is coming, my friends, and I can't wait. As a hater of boots and shoes in general, I can't wait to get my feet out in the sunshine and oxygen of the outdoors again. Better yet, I can't wait to be out on a beach somewhere with the soft grains of sand between my toes....but soon summer too will be upon us here in the northern hemisphere.
I'm working in more topics for my YouTube channel, and on actually donating the clothes, objects, and goods that I have which no longer serve me. It's something I've been meaning to do for some time, but as always, things get in the way and make it easier for me to forget. A few boxes of donations would free up a lot of space both in my personal space and in my mind, because then I wouldn't have to worry about the clutter anymore. Spring is really a great time to simplify life and I intend to do just that for the next few months until preparations for the summer begin.
I'm off to fill a few more boxes now, wish me luck!
Happy Ostara everyone!
Now that the most recent snow piles have begun to melt under the strong sunlight of the longer days, things feel a bit lighter than they were during the winter months. Energies are rising and harkening life back to earth, and people are starting to put away their sweaters in favour of t-shirts. Flip-flop season is coming, my friends, and I can't wait. As a hater of boots and shoes in general, I can't wait to get my feet out in the sunshine and oxygen of the outdoors again. Better yet, I can't wait to be out on a beach somewhere with the soft grains of sand between my toes....but soon summer too will be upon us here in the northern hemisphere.
I'm working in more topics for my YouTube channel, and on actually donating the clothes, objects, and goods that I have which no longer serve me. It's something I've been meaning to do for some time, but as always, things get in the way and make it easier for me to forget. A few boxes of donations would free up a lot of space both in my personal space and in my mind, because then I wouldn't have to worry about the clutter anymore. Spring is really a great time to simplify life and I intend to do just that for the next few months until preparations for the summer begin.
I'm off to fill a few more boxes now, wish me luck!
Happy Ostara everyone!
Sunday, March 17, 2013
Patrick's Prayer
I've always liked certain catholic prayers, and this one is begins with one if my favorite verses. Despite being Christian in origin, this is a very powerful prayer that can be easily adapted to a more pagan flavour. I've done that myself on many occasions, but I wanted to put the original here in honor of Saint Patrick's day today.
Emerald blessings everyone, and I wish you all the luck in Ireland, be you Irish or not.
--------
The Prayer of St. Patrick
I arise today
Through the strength of heaven;
Light of the sun,
Splendor of fire,
Speed of lightning,
Swiftness of the wind,
Depth of the sea,
Stability of the earth,
Firmness of the rock.
I arise today
Through God's strength to pilot me;
God's might to uphold me,
God's wisdom to guide me,
God's eye to look before me,
God's ear to hear me,
God's word to speak for me,
God's hand to guard me,
God's way to lie before me,
God's shield to protect me,
God's hosts to save me
Afar and anear,
Alone or in a mulitude.
Christ shield me today
Against wounding
Christ with me, Christ before me, Christ behind me,
Christ in me, Christ beneath me, Christ above me,
Christ on my right, Christ on my left,
Christ when I lie down, Christ when I sit down,
Christ in the heart of everyone who thinks of me,
Christ in the mouth of everyone who speaks of me,
Christ in the eye that sees me,
Christ in the ear that hears me.
I arise today
Through the mighty strength
Of the Lord of creation.
Emerald blessings everyone, and I wish you all the luck in Ireland, be you Irish or not.
--------
The Prayer of St. Patrick
I arise today
Through the strength of heaven;
Light of the sun,
Splendor of fire,
Speed of lightning,
Swiftness of the wind,
Depth of the sea,
Stability of the earth,
Firmness of the rock.
I arise today
Through God's strength to pilot me;
God's might to uphold me,
God's wisdom to guide me,
God's eye to look before me,
God's ear to hear me,
God's word to speak for me,
God's hand to guard me,
God's way to lie before me,
God's shield to protect me,
God's hosts to save me
Afar and anear,
Alone or in a mulitude.
Christ shield me today
Against wounding
Christ with me, Christ before me, Christ behind me,
Christ in me, Christ beneath me, Christ above me,
Christ on my right, Christ on my left,
Christ when I lie down, Christ when I sit down,
Christ in the heart of everyone who thinks of me,
Christ in the mouth of everyone who speaks of me,
Christ in the eye that sees me,
Christ in the ear that hears me.
I arise today
Through the mighty strength
Of the Lord of creation.
Friday, March 15, 2013
Fierce Creatures
Lately I've been thinking about men. Not in the obvious way (okay, maybe that way too) but mostly about how the reality of the male mind can really contradict the traditional image our North American society bestows upon the male contingency. I knew this partly to be true, but sometimes it takes experience to really believe these things. Now I've always thought very highly of men in general. They have a lot to bear emotionally, just as women have, but they display their emotions so differently than women do. It's not wrong to me, just very different, and of course I respect that. I've always believed in equality, so I've always been respectfully intrigued by men's responses to certain things, emotional situations being the most intriguing of all.
Even in some (most?) branches of Paganism, the male is seen as an impervious pillar of strength, sexuality, and wise know-all of manhood. The hunter/father/king complexity of characteristics all put together so as to personify male-dom. But sometimes in life you get close to a man and see the more hidden side, and most men I've known seem to prefer it that way. At times they do 'sweat the small stuff' as it were, despite their amazing resilience.
It's difficult to see men you admire for their unstoppable imperviousness get things under their skin while you watch helplessly in the background. As a woman, I want to talk things out and improve things through my gift of extended speech, but guys mostly just want to retreat into the impenetrable fortress of their minds and go into lockdown mode. To me this is both alarming and confusing as hell, but what is a female to do in these situations? Not much really. I'm finding out that the less you say, the faster man-wounds heal. I wish I had learned this sooner in life, but alas, we can only learn once we make mistakes I suppose.
To all those men out there I say to you- don't lose patience with women that need words to figure things out. If anything, your silence is just making us freak out more. We can't help it. I'm a culprit of this myself, and thankfully I now know better. Life lesson learned. Perhaps I need to learn more about men than I considered?
Even in some (most?) branches of Paganism, the male is seen as an impervious pillar of strength, sexuality, and wise know-all of manhood. The hunter/father/king complexity of characteristics all put together so as to personify male-dom. But sometimes in life you get close to a man and see the more hidden side, and most men I've known seem to prefer it that way. At times they do 'sweat the small stuff' as it were, despite their amazing resilience.
It's difficult to see men you admire for their unstoppable imperviousness get things under their skin while you watch helplessly in the background. As a woman, I want to talk things out and improve things through my gift of extended speech, but guys mostly just want to retreat into the impenetrable fortress of their minds and go into lockdown mode. To me this is both alarming and confusing as hell, but what is a female to do in these situations? Not much really. I'm finding out that the less you say, the faster man-wounds heal. I wish I had learned this sooner in life, but alas, we can only learn once we make mistakes I suppose.
To all those men out there I say to you- don't lose patience with women that need words to figure things out. If anything, your silence is just making us freak out more. We can't help it. I'm a culprit of this myself, and thankfully I now know better. Life lesson learned. Perhaps I need to learn more about men than I considered?
Friday, March 1, 2013
Mad As A March Hare ( And Other Rabbits)
I feel like the current mercury retrograde has caused me to lapse into a bout of laziness since the beginning of March, but that's not exactly a solid excuse for not posting for so long despite wanting to. I should probably blame the crazy schedule I've been on, and an 11 day bout of bronchitis that drove me nuts, but I won't. In fact, I'm not blaming anyone but my self for being lazy right now. Yes, I'm blaming myself, people, it's not the first time. But today I broke the cycle, so I feel good about that.
This month of March has been full of up and downs- crazy things just seem to appear out if nowhere once the winter thaw sets in. People start getting stir-crazy and hungry for action. I'm not going to go into more detail, but I'm feeling quite cabin-feverish myself right now. Planting some herbs and working on tarot should help my rut, though I think self-love and acceptance is the order of the week. We'll see.
This month of March has been full of up and downs- crazy things just seem to appear out if nowhere once the winter thaw sets in. People start getting stir-crazy and hungry for action. I'm not going to go into more detail, but I'm feeling quite cabin-feverish myself right now. Planting some herbs and working on tarot should help my rut, though I think self-love and acceptance is the order of the week. We'll see.
Thursday, February 28, 2013
Astrology Failings (Full Moon in Virgo)
I'm really not 100% percent on the ball with my Astrology, which is why I've been gradually challenging myself to learn more on the subject, but I do know that right now we have entered the sign of Pisces, the cosmic fish as some call it, and have just moved past the full moon phase as of February 25th. Therefore, I reasonably thought that we had just finished a full moon in Pisces. Apparently that was wrong. Thankfully I did some online research before I posted this and made a fool of myself- pulling a Fox, I'm going to call it. Instead of pulling a Fox, I took some time out and looked up which sign the full moon was actually in. Show's how much I know. The moon was actually in Virgo. Yes, I did a metaphysical face-plant on that one. Ouch.
In light of all this, however, I am seeing a pattern where I can now actually take the time to redeem myself for lacking in Astrological knowledge. It seems like now is a good time to actually use the Farmer's Almanac I bought for 2013 to look for some interesting reading in learning more about Astrology. I had an 'Everything' series book on Astrology, but I was never able to connect to it very well. It was a very well-written book complete with mini-exercises, and I liked reading it, but I just never read it through well enough to understand all the lessons. Bad Stephanie, and entirely my fault. Sometimes I try but I just can't get into it enough to connect on a deeper level. One of my major flaws, sadly. Oh well.
My faults aside, how does my experience right now relate to having the past Full Moon in Virgo surrounded by Piscean energies? Well I did some more research and partially answered this question. My research led me to understand that, first of all, a full moon's sign does not necessarily correlate to the sun-centered astrological signs that occur on a monthly basis. Rather the moon's sign changes on a near-daily basis as per the fluctuations of the daily signs that occur on each day during the year. More clearly, the monthly signs are one part of the astrological cycle for the year with 12 signs for each approximate month. The daily signs also follow a similar cycle with a time period for each sign (about a day and half) with a smaller time period known to astrologers as 'void-of-course', which means there is no sign during that time. According to traditional astrological belief, planning to do activities during void-of-course periods is not advisable, even counter-productive or unlucky. Perhaps a good reason to invest in a moon calendar, for those of us that have a tendency to be superstitious at times.
Another topic of interest I discovered was that right now we are within a Mercury retrograde period- as if my skills and methods of communication were not lacking enough right now. I've read about Mercury retrograde issues before when I first began to read horoscopes more frequently. I knew I wouldn't be a fan of these time periods when I heard about them. Who would? I'm guessing this is why I haven't felt the urge to make a Tarot video in the last few weeks. Again, bad Stephanie. This may also be a contributing factor to why someone I know decided to move out of their apartment unexpectedly, completely forgetting to mention it to their landlord and forfeiting their damage deposit. I told them so. That Mercury retrograde gets you every time.
All that aside, the moon in Virgo during a Pisces month is pretty interesting. The signs themselves are contradictory; Virgo being a stable and practical earth sign, and Pisces an ever-changing and emotional water sign. In that respect, this full moon was a bit all over the place. And I did feel a bit out of sorts during the days of the full moon. I felt emotional, hormonal, a tired, and mostly stuck in a bad situation- like I had no way out of my muddled mess of a mind. It was a losing battle at bedtime as well. Vivid dreams with lots of men and weird situations on a houseboat. Thank goodness that one didn't last long.
Anyhow, I should try and learn more about Astrology. It is key knowledge in working well with witchcraft and understanding the cycles of time within nature and the universe. If Nostradamus could do it, so can I, I guess.
In light of all this, however, I am seeing a pattern where I can now actually take the time to redeem myself for lacking in Astrological knowledge. It seems like now is a good time to actually use the Farmer's Almanac I bought for 2013 to look for some interesting reading in learning more about Astrology. I had an 'Everything' series book on Astrology, but I was never able to connect to it very well. It was a very well-written book complete with mini-exercises, and I liked reading it, but I just never read it through well enough to understand all the lessons. Bad Stephanie, and entirely my fault. Sometimes I try but I just can't get into it enough to connect on a deeper level. One of my major flaws, sadly. Oh well.
My faults aside, how does my experience right now relate to having the past Full Moon in Virgo surrounded by Piscean energies? Well I did some more research and partially answered this question. My research led me to understand that, first of all, a full moon's sign does not necessarily correlate to the sun-centered astrological signs that occur on a monthly basis. Rather the moon's sign changes on a near-daily basis as per the fluctuations of the daily signs that occur on each day during the year. More clearly, the monthly signs are one part of the astrological cycle for the year with 12 signs for each approximate month. The daily signs also follow a similar cycle with a time period for each sign (about a day and half) with a smaller time period known to astrologers as 'void-of-course', which means there is no sign during that time. According to traditional astrological belief, planning to do activities during void-of-course periods is not advisable, even counter-productive or unlucky. Perhaps a good reason to invest in a moon calendar, for those of us that have a tendency to be superstitious at times.
Another topic of interest I discovered was that right now we are within a Mercury retrograde period- as if my skills and methods of communication were not lacking enough right now. I've read about Mercury retrograde issues before when I first began to read horoscopes more frequently. I knew I wouldn't be a fan of these time periods when I heard about them. Who would? I'm guessing this is why I haven't felt the urge to make a Tarot video in the last few weeks. Again, bad Stephanie. This may also be a contributing factor to why someone I know decided to move out of their apartment unexpectedly, completely forgetting to mention it to their landlord and forfeiting their damage deposit. I told them so. That Mercury retrograde gets you every time.
All that aside, the moon in Virgo during a Pisces month is pretty interesting. The signs themselves are contradictory; Virgo being a stable and practical earth sign, and Pisces an ever-changing and emotional water sign. In that respect, this full moon was a bit all over the place. And I did feel a bit out of sorts during the days of the full moon. I felt emotional, hormonal, a tired, and mostly stuck in a bad situation- like I had no way out of my muddled mess of a mind. It was a losing battle at bedtime as well. Vivid dreams with lots of men and weird situations on a houseboat. Thank goodness that one didn't last long.
Anyhow, I should try and learn more about Astrology. It is key knowledge in working well with witchcraft and understanding the cycles of time within nature and the universe. If Nostradamus could do it, so can I, I guess.
Wednesday, February 27, 2013
Grey Areas In Dating
Normally I wouldn't post about this kind of thing, as I'm more private when it comes to my love-life, but I've been so lost in thought lately on this subject I felt a good purge was in order today.
Perhaps others out there have been in this situation, but lately I feel as if I alone carry this sort of 'burden'. I guess you could call it that, maybe. Anyways, the crux of it is that I've been in a relationship with the same man for 8 years. I love him to death and we both know that we will end up together eventually. At this point in our lives we don't know exactly when, but we know it will be sometime in the future. That being said, despite knowing we will be together forever, we are not in a position to be engaged to one another. We are living in different countries at the moment, have very different family issues going on (this is more my side than his), and we are busy putting out lives together so that we can eventually move in with one another, somewhere in the world, at some point. So yes, there is a lot of physical disconnect despite the fact that we are very connected mentally and emotionally to each other. Now, my question has been for a long time- what does one do when they are not ready to be engaged, but are not single and not "on the market", so to speak? Is there anything, any cultural significance to this intermediary stage between dating and marriage? I know for sure that I'm in a committed relationship, just not ready to be engaged for marriage. How do I advertise this to other people? Is there a way? I have a feeling there isn't, but that's not a reason to forget about it. My solution right now is to wear a ring on my left hand. I've been doing it for years, since before I even met my boyfriend, as jewelry is one of my favourite things in the world. I've even been known to wear, goddess help me, engagement-style rings on my left hand despite not being engaged. Perhaps this is wrong of me, but I love him and I don't want to advertise that I might be single. Thus an interesting solution presented itself. I could wear an engagement like ring out in public, have people think I was engaged, but I wouldn't actually be engaged. And yes, my logic is just spectacular at these moments, I'm sure you're thinking that right now.
I suppose I should just come out and say that my reasons for sending this information out into the universe is a bit two-sided; yes, I want to get this off my chest, but on the other hand I also want validation to my actions. I'm just not sure what to do with my feelings. Right now I deeply feel that I am undeniably connected to my boyfriend, so much so that I feel I am engaged to him. There is that deep connection on so many levels that makes our relationship beyond the 'committed but still just dating' dynamic. But we're not in a position to be married yet. I have no idea what to do about these feelings, but hopefully I can somehow figure out how to deal with them one day. Maybe when I actually get engaged.
Yeah, I'm a silly girl sometimes. Whatever.
Perhaps others out there have been in this situation, but lately I feel as if I alone carry this sort of 'burden'. I guess you could call it that, maybe. Anyways, the crux of it is that I've been in a relationship with the same man for 8 years. I love him to death and we both know that we will end up together eventually. At this point in our lives we don't know exactly when, but we know it will be sometime in the future. That being said, despite knowing we will be together forever, we are not in a position to be engaged to one another. We are living in different countries at the moment, have very different family issues going on (this is more my side than his), and we are busy putting out lives together so that we can eventually move in with one another, somewhere in the world, at some point. So yes, there is a lot of physical disconnect despite the fact that we are very connected mentally and emotionally to each other. Now, my question has been for a long time- what does one do when they are not ready to be engaged, but are not single and not "on the market", so to speak? Is there anything, any cultural significance to this intermediary stage between dating and marriage? I know for sure that I'm in a committed relationship, just not ready to be engaged for marriage. How do I advertise this to other people? Is there a way? I have a feeling there isn't, but that's not a reason to forget about it. My solution right now is to wear a ring on my left hand. I've been doing it for years, since before I even met my boyfriend, as jewelry is one of my favourite things in the world. I've even been known to wear, goddess help me, engagement-style rings on my left hand despite not being engaged. Perhaps this is wrong of me, but I love him and I don't want to advertise that I might be single. Thus an interesting solution presented itself. I could wear an engagement like ring out in public, have people think I was engaged, but I wouldn't actually be engaged. And yes, my logic is just spectacular at these moments, I'm sure you're thinking that right now.
I suppose I should just come out and say that my reasons for sending this information out into the universe is a bit two-sided; yes, I want to get this off my chest, but on the other hand I also want validation to my actions. I'm just not sure what to do with my feelings. Right now I deeply feel that I am undeniably connected to my boyfriend, so much so that I feel I am engaged to him. There is that deep connection on so many levels that makes our relationship beyond the 'committed but still just dating' dynamic. But we're not in a position to be married yet. I have no idea what to do about these feelings, but hopefully I can somehow figure out how to deal with them one day. Maybe when I actually get engaged.
Yeah, I'm a silly girl sometimes. Whatever.
Saturday, February 23, 2013
Major Arcana: The Magician
As much as I like and appreciate this card being called 'The Magician' amongst the English Tarot decks, when I actually think about the significance of this card as an archetype I tend to go more with the French title, 'Le Bateleur'. Translated literally, this gives the card the more mundane name of 'The Street Performer', as opposed to the more grandiose and macabre 'Magician'. Over the years of using and learning to read the tarot, I have often supposed the true intent of the card's archetypal name would be something like 'The Street Magician'- incorporating the image of an ordinary person doing extraordinary things, which to me, makes much more sense in the grand scheme of things. Don't we all wish we could be extraordinary? Have we not watched someone performing so-called "magic-tricks" and felt both awed and perhaps slightly envious of their talent? Maybe so, or maybe not. Regardless, a street performer of 'magic' is, as we know, not performing magic at all. At least magic in the metaphysical sense (I could elaborate on that statement quite lengthily, but that really is another post entirely of its own). The street performers 'magic' is in his tools, yes; they are specially made for that purpose. But give the spectators the same tools and see if they can work the same routines- the same 'magic'. It will never work. This is the essence of the Magician. A Magician is his tools of trade and his internal knowledge and talents. As you can see, it's more David Copperfield than Merlin. Each and every one of us could perhaps learn to be David Copperfield; not all of us can be Merlin. That's not to say that a Copperfield could never become a Merlin. The difference to me is the ability to use and control the material tools you possess versus the ability to control the cosmic elements and the ether around you. One is of external control and the other a more internal control. Pulling a rabbit out of a hat is true talent; using your own personal energy to manifest positive forces in your life is true magic.
To sum it all up- we all need to learn and teach ourselves how to be the best we can be in life with what we have been given as people, as unique and powerful human beings. The first step in the mastery of life is learning to be the street performer, but the ultimate test of life is learning how to be the magician.
Wednesday, February 20, 2013
Falling Between the Cracks
Wisecracks, that is. I told myself that I should just forget it and not be one of those bloggers that uses their blog to blast Fox News and voice their Pagan opinion on the comments that (unfortunately) surfaced on national television the other day. Then again, why should I not?
I've mentioned before, in passing, how I've felt about bringing my Pagan-self out into semi-public view. It was never an idea I was completely over-the-moon with, but coming out of one's shell is something that must be done when the time comes to advance in almost anything. Pushing yourself to go beyond your limits is the only thing that will enable you to show yourself just how capable you really are. So I'm more out there than I used to be now, and I'm still happy. I'm still the person I want to be and I like how other people see me, so, in a word, I have advanced. Hurray for me. Now Fox News, in their delightfully denigrading morning talk show, has spoiled some of my advancement into the big, bad world out there. I use the term 'some' because I honestly think they were just being their usual un-informed selves and not intentionally trying to be malicious. One would hope, anyway. I cannot fault them for their stupidity- it's not like they know any better. But really, they should. For the sake of their viewers, and social equality, they should know what the hell they're talking about. To say that Wiccans (Pagans in general, really) have 20 holidays is just absurd. Would they care to reference where they found this information? Even a quick glance at Wikipedia would have given them a pretty accurate answer. So shame on you, Fox News. I don't watch your morning show, and if this is the kind of quality of information I'd expect to hear on anything- morning traffic included- I will certainly not be watching in the near future. Or ever.
How's that for a Dungeons-and-Dragons-playing-twice-divorced-incense-burning-midwifery-loving Pagan?
You dolts.
If you are interested in listening to this drivel, you may find it here. Don't say I didn't warn you.
Okay, I'm done.
I've mentioned before, in passing, how I've felt about bringing my Pagan-self out into semi-public view. It was never an idea I was completely over-the-moon with, but coming out of one's shell is something that must be done when the time comes to advance in almost anything. Pushing yourself to go beyond your limits is the only thing that will enable you to show yourself just how capable you really are. So I'm more out there than I used to be now, and I'm still happy. I'm still the person I want to be and I like how other people see me, so, in a word, I have advanced. Hurray for me. Now Fox News, in their delightfully denigrading morning talk show, has spoiled some of my advancement into the big, bad world out there. I use the term 'some' because I honestly think they were just being their usual un-informed selves and not intentionally trying to be malicious. One would hope, anyway. I cannot fault them for their stupidity- it's not like they know any better. But really, they should. For the sake of their viewers, and social equality, they should know what the hell they're talking about. To say that Wiccans (Pagans in general, really) have 20 holidays is just absurd. Would they care to reference where they found this information? Even a quick glance at Wikipedia would have given them a pretty accurate answer. So shame on you, Fox News. I don't watch your morning show, and if this is the kind of quality of information I'd expect to hear on anything- morning traffic included- I will certainly not be watching in the near future. Or ever.
How's that for a Dungeons-and-Dragons-playing-twice-divorced-incense-burning-midwifery-loving Pagan?
You dolts.
If you are interested in listening to this drivel, you may find it here. Don't say I didn't warn you.
Okay, I'm done.
Sunday, February 10, 2013
Aches and Snakes
It's that time if year again- Chinese New Year, that is! This year is the year of the Snake, so I feel somehow that this year will bring me to focus more on spirituality and the incorporating the Goddess into my daily life, as one of the oldest symbols of the Goddess is the snake. Snakes are symbols of transformation and wisdom, and of the active kundalini spirit that compromises ourselves within the chakra centers of our bodies. I have not devoted much time to chakra work as of late, but it's never too late to learn more and strive to keep everything in balance. To be honest, since the beginning of my learning to work with my chakras, I have become more adept at sensing my imbalances during certain times. I know that my recent anger and annoyance stems from my root and sacral chakras being out of wack, surely. My pendulum will certainly get a workout this week when I get started on clearing aligning my muladhara to my sahaswara. That's the root chakra and the crown chakra names in Sanskrit, and no, I'm not trying to be smart. It's true that I've noticed more often when my chakras are off-keel; at the same time I tend to have backaches. Taking that as a physical manifestation of misalignment, I know it's time to clear things up, metaphysically speaking. Not much of a backache right now, but I am having trouble sleeping and getting comfortable in bed- probably a sign of a backache to come. At least it's kept me awake long enough to write this post.
Gong Xi Fa Cai, and wishing you all much abundance and luck for the year of the Snake.
Blessed be xoxox
Gong Xi Fa Cai, and wishing you all much abundance and luck for the year of the Snake.
Blessed be xoxox
Thursday, February 7, 2013
Post-Imbolc Thoughts
This year I (thankfully) was able to celebrate my Imbolc ritual to honor the goddess Brigid on the night of February 1st. As opposed to lat year when I was so stressed out it took me two weeks to finally get enough peace and quiet to centre my thoughts and take a breather for some Brigid-centric fun, though it felt a bit chore-like in the beginning. This year was not that bad, but it did take some time to get my mind off the present state of my home environment. At least a few moments of grounding in front if my altar gave me peace of mind and the relaxation I needed to get in the mood. It's so hard to be happy when others around myself are stressed or upset, I've noticed. Otherwise, I managed to set up my sacred space and cast my circle well enough. I'm still working on a natural rhythm to my rituals, but I need more time with my written rituals, which right now I'm making do without. Oh well. Such is life when you are living between countries.
Essentially, this Imbolc was the third year in a row that I have reaffirmed my connection to Brigid. I have always felt a strong connection to her, as mentioned in my last post, but this Imbolc I had the feeling that I was missing something. I'm not a Dianic sort of practitioner in my craft, but I do get the feeling that I've been leaving the God-aspect out of my rituals too much. Not on purpose, but because there isn't much of a God-focus at times than there is a Goddess-focus in the Wiccan/Witchcraft material I find myself absorbed in at times. Realizing this gap in my spiritual practice had led me to want to learn more about the male side of Wicca and witchcraft, and the male aspect in paganism in general. Hopefully I can find some practical and enlightening reading material on the subject- perhaps a good look online through various websites can give me some more ideas.
Otherwise, this Imbolc was great for my mental and spiritual well-being. I feel recharged and ready for the coming spring. Hopefully I can find more inner strength to empower myself for the coming months until I have the freedom I need to move forward with my life.
Essentially, this Imbolc was the third year in a row that I have reaffirmed my connection to Brigid. I have always felt a strong connection to her, as mentioned in my last post, but this Imbolc I had the feeling that I was missing something. I'm not a Dianic sort of practitioner in my craft, but I do get the feeling that I've been leaving the God-aspect out of my rituals too much. Not on purpose, but because there isn't much of a God-focus at times than there is a Goddess-focus in the Wiccan/Witchcraft material I find myself absorbed in at times. Realizing this gap in my spiritual practice had led me to want to learn more about the male side of Wicca and witchcraft, and the male aspect in paganism in general. Hopefully I can find some practical and enlightening reading material on the subject- perhaps a good look online through various websites can give me some more ideas.
Otherwise, this Imbolc was great for my mental and spiritual well-being. I feel recharged and ready for the coming spring. Hopefully I can find more inner strength to empower myself for the coming months until I have the freedom I need to move forward with my life.
Preparing for Imbolc (More on my Altar)
More on my altar space before I started the Imbolc festivities. It's really just me gabbing and going off on a few random things; being home again makes me reminisce like that.
My Lovely Altar
After a year away from my sacred space I did some freshening up and decided it was a good opportunity to do a video. Have fun watching and leave comments if you like.
Friday, February 1, 2013
Brigid's Day
Already we have reached the month of February; a month of love, the coming end of winter, groundhogs, and leap days. For me, the month of February has not only been about those aspects, but has also been about the Goddess, specifically the goddess Brigid. I was drawn to the goddess Brigid during research about traditional triple goddesses. Her name came up during my studies and I was intrigued at how she was a triple goddess symbolizing poetry, metal smithing, and healing with a connection to the element of fire. As a Sagittarius that loves to get creatively inspired by writing, crafting, and natural remedies, I figured Brigid would be right up my alley, goddess-wise. She certainly has become a source of inspiration to me over the years, and perhaps I am now a little wiser for it.
Working with Brigid, whether in an esbat, at Imbolc/Candlemas (also known as her feast day in the Catholic Church), or in meditation, has given me a sense of freedom of expression always with a burst of creative energy. On the first Imbolc I actually celebrated I wrote my first Sabbat ritual. No joke. The ritual was conceived and written out in about 30 minutes, right on my laptop during a small ice storm. It was the most exhilarated I'd been in ages and amazingly, I performed the ritual that same night feeling a creative spark that continued well on for the next two weeks. My Book of Shadows took a turn for the better, getting filled up with more than twenty pages of material in just over two weeks, which for me was a milestone.
Still Brigid continues to inspire me, even in the hardest of times. As a thank you I dance for her, to send some energy back into the universe in return for Brigid as a divine muse to my creative self. Whether that energy really gets back to her, I do not know, but what I do know is that I feel better for doing it and maybe, in some miniscule, obscure way, it does give back something I may have taken from the ether of our universe.
I love the goddess Brigid, and I hope to know of her and the fire that fuels her positive creation capabilities she may bestow upon myself for many years to come. Hopefully all that wish to understand her and gain knowledge from her fiery wisdom may do so with much happiness and, as the French say, "joie de vivre".
Working with Brigid, whether in an esbat, at Imbolc/Candlemas (also known as her feast day in the Catholic Church), or in meditation, has given me a sense of freedom of expression always with a burst of creative energy. On the first Imbolc I actually celebrated I wrote my first Sabbat ritual. No joke. The ritual was conceived and written out in about 30 minutes, right on my laptop during a small ice storm. It was the most exhilarated I'd been in ages and amazingly, I performed the ritual that same night feeling a creative spark that continued well on for the next two weeks. My Book of Shadows took a turn for the better, getting filled up with more than twenty pages of material in just over two weeks, which for me was a milestone.
Still Brigid continues to inspire me, even in the hardest of times. As a thank you I dance for her, to send some energy back into the universe in return for Brigid as a divine muse to my creative self. Whether that energy really gets back to her, I do not know, but what I do know is that I feel better for doing it and maybe, in some miniscule, obscure way, it does give back something I may have taken from the ether of our universe.
I love the goddess Brigid, and I hope to know of her and the fire that fuels her positive creation capabilities she may bestow upon myself for many years to come. Hopefully all that wish to understand her and gain knowledge from her fiery wisdom may do so with much happiness and, as the French say, "joie de vivre".
Friday, January 25, 2013
Home Sweet Home
It's been a very long time since I've been back home, and finally getting the chance to come back for a two week break has been great. It's been five days since I've been home, and I cannot recall feeling this relaxed or calm in quite awhile. Not to say that coming back home after so long did not pose some problems, but they are fairly minor compared to those I left back in the city. I truly missed the peaceful sounds of the countryside amid the trees, deer, and rolling hills of central New Jersey. I missed my local farmer's market and quaint town centre, full of tiny locally owned shops and boutiques- though sadly many have gone out of business while I was away. Terrible how we can still see the remnants of the bad economy even so long after it has begun to improve.
Despite my occasional melancholia at the changes to my little town, I am so glad to see many of the same faces that I remembered from before. I am also glad to see that my altar in my room is still as I left it, candles, incense and all. That is definitely one thing I very much miss having around the house. Even at the beginning of my studies in the craft I had a (very) simple and small altar as my sacred space. Now that I don't have that present in my day-to-day, it does cause me to feel more disconnected to my spirituality than I felt before. Having a marked area as a reminder of my path gave me a greater sense of calm and strength. Not having a visual definition of the old ways has made living my life in accordance with my beliefs much harder. It is much easier to forget to be mindful than to remember mindfulness.
The full moon is here, so I must plan to get in touch with my sacred space before I leave once again. I will post again next week to let all of you, my dear readers, know how it is going.
Despite my occasional melancholia at the changes to my little town, I am so glad to see many of the same faces that I remembered from before. I am also glad to see that my altar in my room is still as I left it, candles, incense and all. That is definitely one thing I very much miss having around the house. Even at the beginning of my studies in the craft I had a (very) simple and small altar as my sacred space. Now that I don't have that present in my day-to-day, it does cause me to feel more disconnected to my spirituality than I felt before. Having a marked area as a reminder of my path gave me a greater sense of calm and strength. Not having a visual definition of the old ways has made living my life in accordance with my beliefs much harder. It is much easier to forget to be mindful than to remember mindfulness.
The full moon is here, so I must plan to get in touch with my sacred space before I leave once again. I will post again next week to let all of you, my dear readers, know how it is going.
Saturday, January 19, 2013
Back on the Etsy Bandwagon!
I finally have a new item listed in my Etsy shop with more to come in the following weeks.
It's been quite a long time since I was selling on Etsy, but I hope that this time around I can attract new followers with the help of my new friend, Social Media (Twitter is great), and my new YouTube channel, Saphira Blue Tarot.
To begin, I've decided to go slow and not list too many things at once. I want to try and have a nice variation of witchy-things to offer as well, just to keep things fresh. Fresh is good. Expect quite a few Tarot spreads to be available, and also crystal readings. Crystal ball readings are great for delving deeper into the psyche and hidden messages, and it would be wonderful to get to use more time in my scrying endeavours for others.
I may also offer some of my rosaries for sale again, this time perhaps for those that want a nice beaded aid for their Pagan (or non-Pagan, I'm not fussy) prayers. I may even offer some of my more metaphysically-geared soaps for sale as well. Still trying to figure it out as time goes by, though I'm sure I'll come to some kind of happy medium, no pun intended.
Stay tuned, and you can visit my Etsy shop anytime you like using the widget on my Blogger page and in the link here: Saphira Blue Tarot on Etsy.
It's been quite a long time since I was selling on Etsy, but I hope that this time around I can attract new followers with the help of my new friend, Social Media (Twitter is great), and my new YouTube channel, Saphira Blue Tarot.
To begin, I've decided to go slow and not list too many things at once. I want to try and have a nice variation of witchy-things to offer as well, just to keep things fresh. Fresh is good. Expect quite a few Tarot spreads to be available, and also crystal readings. Crystal ball readings are great for delving deeper into the psyche and hidden messages, and it would be wonderful to get to use more time in my scrying endeavours for others.
I may also offer some of my rosaries for sale again, this time perhaps for those that want a nice beaded aid for their Pagan (or non-Pagan, I'm not fussy) prayers. I may even offer some of my more metaphysically-geared soaps for sale as well. Still trying to figure it out as time goes by, though I'm sure I'll come to some kind of happy medium, no pun intended.
Stay tuned, and you can visit my Etsy shop anytime you like using the widget on my Blogger page and in the link here: Saphira Blue Tarot on Etsy.
Friday, January 18, 2013
What To Do?
I was talking to a friend of mine today, and I 'm pretty sure they may have been a victim of psychic attack.*
This is a bit of controversial topic from what I know of; some circles don't even consider psychic attacks to be a real thing in the (meta)physical world. My personal opinion on the topic is that it is real. In the past I have had experiences where I felt tired, sick, in pain, but could not pinpoint anything specific that was ailing me. I have also lived with psychic vampires nearly my whole life- I knew what that felt like before I even knew that kind of person existed.
My friend is facing the same problems now and for the last few weeks- a haze of unexplained malaise, lack of interest in anything, constant tiredness, and feeling impossibly forlorn, even hateful at times. I know my friend very well; for nearly a whole decade we've been like two peas in pod, so I know when their behaviour just does not suit their situation. They have no financial burdens, things are good in their relationships at home, they have a loving partner that would do anything for them and loves them unconditionally- so why the slump? My friend has even confessed that it's in their head, so why can they not break the depressive cycle?
I pondered, and pondered, finally coming to the conclusion that it may be a psychic attack. From what or whom I have no idea, but I do suspect that a Tarot reading could clarify this matter much further than I ever could just postulate.
*I'm not specifying he or she as to keep confidentiality on the part of my friend.
This is a bit of controversial topic from what I know of; some circles don't even consider psychic attacks to be a real thing in the (meta)physical world. My personal opinion on the topic is that it is real. In the past I have had experiences where I felt tired, sick, in pain, but could not pinpoint anything specific that was ailing me. I have also lived with psychic vampires nearly my whole life- I knew what that felt like before I even knew that kind of person existed.
My friend is facing the same problems now and for the last few weeks- a haze of unexplained malaise, lack of interest in anything, constant tiredness, and feeling impossibly forlorn, even hateful at times. I know my friend very well; for nearly a whole decade we've been like two peas in pod, so I know when their behaviour just does not suit their situation. They have no financial burdens, things are good in their relationships at home, they have a loving partner that would do anything for them and loves them unconditionally- so why the slump? My friend has even confessed that it's in their head, so why can they not break the depressive cycle?
I pondered, and pondered, finally coming to the conclusion that it may be a psychic attack. From what or whom I have no idea, but I do suspect that a Tarot reading could clarify this matter much further than I ever could just postulate.
----
Earlier this evening I did do a Tarot reading for my friend, to see what was up and how I could be of help to them. I will keep their cards private, but what I will say is there was a lot of emotion (water) coming up in their life, which means that they may still be living in the past, not to mention that the card I pulled on how to help out was the reversed (R) IX of Cups. Lots of water, emotions are running high, but in different ways. I cannot speak on their actually reading, but I will say that my friend and I do have a long history and we are similar but different. We have been there for each other in the past, and will continue to do so in the future.
With the IX of CUPS, I see this to mean that I must be supportive towards my friend to help them reach their goals, but I cannot be passive. I must take an active role in order to facilitate change in their life for the better. Whether they were victim to a psychic attack or not, I must be there by their side to help them heal for the future, whatever that may bring. It will be a positive future, I noted, with friends and many people by their side.
I hope that I can do this for my friend; that they will allow me the privilege to get close enough to their heart and soul so that these past wounds can heal. It will take some time and much active effort, but it can and will be done. I just pray that Goddess will guide me towards making the right choices when the time comes.
*I'm not specifying he or she as to keep confidentiality on the part of my friend.
Thursday, January 17, 2013
A Simple Prayer
(originally written October 10th, 2010)
Great Goddess, bless the moon and sun,
Our homes, our hearths-
Love all as one.
With courage I call to you
In merry meet-
Hear this prayer I doth entreat:
By Lord and Lady,
Bold and bright,
Watch over us both day and night.
Keep us from thirst;
Keep us well-fed;
Protect us whilst we're in our beds.
By the power of three
And the power in me,
This is my will so mote it be.
(c) Stephanie Ghanem, 2013
Major Arcana: The Fool
How I see it:
The Fool card is the innocent, youthful, and unstoppable spirit that each person has inside of them, wanting to be let out in order to venture forward into the great beyond. The urge and desire to move forward is there with the Fool , yet there will be things to hold us back. These obstacles may be minor or great; they may even take longer to overcome than imagined. Even so, the Fool is not about over coming obstacles within a journey, it is about starting the journey itself- sometimes the most difficult part of the process.
Overall, the Fool card speaks to me as the start of a process that has a goal in mind, but no direction specifically, which is why sometimes we must have faith in ourselves to guide us instead of a map.
Wednesday, January 16, 2013
Tarot Journal Journey: A New Start
I didn't mention this in my previous blog post about my personal goals for this year, but I've come to the realization that I like to blog quite a bit. I do have a few more readers now, and, as I've always thought, the more the merrier. Seeing as expansion is on my list of things to accomplish for 2013 for numerous areas in my life (i.e. business endeavours, weight-loss and health) why not add the Tarot to my list? Improving one's skills has always been a priority, and the need will arise one day when I must step up my game. Might as well start now- stagnation never prospers.
To begin, I'm starting with every card of the Major Arcana in chronological order, and then on to the Minor Arcana. This will certainly be more than a year long process, but that's okay. Rushing is no fun anyways.
Along with my Tarot journal posts, I also think it's time to make my witchcraft journal more public. I do have a book that I've use these last three years as my witchie journal and partial Book of Shadows, and it's nearly full to boot, but I hate writing by hand. My handwriting is by default atrocious; it's not worth the effort of keeping a handwritten journal if I have no idea what's written in it half the time. This is where the magic of blogging comes in. Yes, it does draw some publicity, but I don't mind people reading about my experiences. Perhaps if ideas and experiences could be a bit more open between Pagans and witchcraft adherents people on the outside wouldn't feel so strange about us sharing their space. But I digress. I'm not here to debate keeping silent, but rather to promote my openness about sharing. Certainly if I have a spiritual experience that I found to be too shocking or inappropriate I wouldn't not volunteer to share it with the public, however this has yet to happen. Maybe some day when I'm older and more experienced with Astral projection perhaps.
I'll post old entries from my Book of Shadows as the weeks go by, keeping my posts relevant to the seasons and Sabbats. Imbolc is coming soon, for example, so I will post some of my writing about Imbolc or experiences I've had during that time. My journal was not a daily one, so my written entries are a bit helter-skelter throughout the year. I'm not good at consistency at times, but I try my best.
Now for you, my readers, I ask if you've every tried journal writing on the Tarot or have you ever kept a Book of Shadows? I always admire those that create beautiful ones with fancy handwriting and personal drawings and such. At least with my blog I can order a print out of my posts, so that's my answer to the Book of Shadows- works for me.
To begin, I'm starting with every card of the Major Arcana in chronological order, and then on to the Minor Arcana. This will certainly be more than a year long process, but that's okay. Rushing is no fun anyways.
Along with my Tarot journal posts, I also think it's time to make my witchcraft journal more public. I do have a book that I've use these last three years as my witchie journal and partial Book of Shadows, and it's nearly full to boot, but I hate writing by hand. My handwriting is by default atrocious; it's not worth the effort of keeping a handwritten journal if I have no idea what's written in it half the time. This is where the magic of blogging comes in. Yes, it does draw some publicity, but I don't mind people reading about my experiences. Perhaps if ideas and experiences could be a bit more open between Pagans and witchcraft adherents people on the outside wouldn't feel so strange about us sharing their space. But I digress. I'm not here to debate keeping silent, but rather to promote my openness about sharing. Certainly if I have a spiritual experience that I found to be too shocking or inappropriate I wouldn't not volunteer to share it with the public, however this has yet to happen. Maybe some day when I'm older and more experienced with Astral projection perhaps.
I'll post old entries from my Book of Shadows as the weeks go by, keeping my posts relevant to the seasons and Sabbats. Imbolc is coming soon, for example, so I will post some of my writing about Imbolc or experiences I've had during that time. My journal was not a daily one, so my written entries are a bit helter-skelter throughout the year. I'm not good at consistency at times, but I try my best.
Now for you, my readers, I ask if you've every tried journal writing on the Tarot or have you ever kept a Book of Shadows? I always admire those that create beautiful ones with fancy handwriting and personal drawings and such. At least with my blog I can order a print out of my posts, so that's my answer to the Book of Shadows- works for me.
Tuesday, January 15, 2013
100th Post Fun!
Heaving reached my 100th post here on Blogger, I thought the best way to celebrate would be with a video on the crystals I have and use in my Tarot readings and during the Esbats, Sabbats, spell work, and meditation sessions.
I don't have much with me right now (the rest of my collection is in New Jersey at the moment), but since I usually have my crystals with me most of the time I thought it would be fun to do a short 'show and tell' video on my crystal stash at the moment. I tried to put out as much information as I could on they type of the crystals and their uses, but I'm not that versed in crystals, so I would suggest looking further if you want more information on something specific relating to crystals and their use or a type of crystal for a specific intent.
I hope you like my mini-collection, and don't be afraid to comment about your own, if you have any crystals, as well!
I don't have much with me right now (the rest of my collection is in New Jersey at the moment), but since I usually have my crystals with me most of the time I thought it would be fun to do a short 'show and tell' video on my crystal stash at the moment. I tried to put out as much information as I could on they type of the crystals and their uses, but I'm not that versed in crystals, so I would suggest looking further if you want more information on something specific relating to crystals and their use or a type of crystal for a specific intent.
I hope you like my mini-collection, and don't be afraid to comment about your own, if you have any crystals, as well!
Thursday, January 10, 2013
Taking Care of Business
Hello Readers! Once again, Happy New Year, and I hope you've all had a relatively relaxing holiday season. Mine was a whirlwind of activity, but now comes the fun stuff (real work). After the holiday cheer wore off
I had to dig my car out of 3-4 feet of snow, which I'm still not done as of yet. Almost though.
It's tough, hard work, and for a 5'5" chubby girl with short legs it's even harder. Believe me, I wish I had much longer arms and legs. Sometimes I can't throw the snow far enough out of my shovel, and it lands on my face...Pretty pathetic.
Yet, as much as I complain, I must admit that those hours of digging out the car in the driveway gave me much time to think about what I want to accomplish over the course of the coming year. Things that I previously was doing relatively okay with, but want to improve. Like my health, my weight-loss, my businesses, and my relationship with my boyfriend (not the actually relationship between us, but the long-distance relationship aspect of it), my online endeavors, and so on.
My number one on the 2013 "to-do" list is actually not what I expected. Most people would put their health first, which I probably should, but seeing as my health is an ongoing process I've decided instead to put focus on my business instead as a major priority. Having spent the last 1.5 plus years doing almost nothing for myself and nearly everything for others, I cannot stand this anymore. I know and recognize the fact that I need to start doing things for myself to further my life and my career (what's that, hmm?).
So my resolutions for 2013 are as follows: get my business performing outside the scope of what it is now (not really much at all), improve my business potential, post on my blog at least twice a week, get myself doing more videos on Tarot for my YouTube channel, and bring back my Tarot Etsy shop and maybe open my soap shop online as well (but perhaps not on Etsy). I love Etsy to bits, but there is too much going on there for me to get properly noticed. I'm still having an inner debate on this issue, though. As I always say, we'll see.
If anyone is interested, I'm posting a widget for my Etsy store on this blog. I'll have a few readings up soon for purchase so keep watch here on my blog. My next post will be the 100th, so I'm planning to write up something fun and interesting for you guys.
Okay, better get down to business! I'm off.
For a Tarot reading and other types of readings, you can visit my shop, Saphira Blue Tarot, here.
I had to dig my car out of 3-4 feet of snow, which I'm still not done as of yet. Almost though.
It's tough, hard work, and for a 5'5" chubby girl with short legs it's even harder. Believe me, I wish I had much longer arms and legs. Sometimes I can't throw the snow far enough out of my shovel, and it lands on my face...Pretty pathetic.
Yet, as much as I complain, I must admit that those hours of digging out the car in the driveway gave me much time to think about what I want to accomplish over the course of the coming year. Things that I previously was doing relatively okay with, but want to improve. Like my health, my weight-loss, my businesses, and my relationship with my boyfriend (not the actually relationship between us, but the long-distance relationship aspect of it), my online endeavors, and so on.
My number one on the 2013 "to-do" list is actually not what I expected. Most people would put their health first, which I probably should, but seeing as my health is an ongoing process I've decided instead to put focus on my business instead as a major priority. Having spent the last 1.5 plus years doing almost nothing for myself and nearly everything for others, I cannot stand this anymore. I know and recognize the fact that I need to start doing things for myself to further my life and my career (what's that, hmm?).
So my resolutions for 2013 are as follows: get my business performing outside the scope of what it is now (not really much at all), improve my business potential, post on my blog at least twice a week, get myself doing more videos on Tarot for my YouTube channel, and bring back my Tarot Etsy shop and maybe open my soap shop online as well (but perhaps not on Etsy). I love Etsy to bits, but there is too much going on there for me to get properly noticed. I'm still having an inner debate on this issue, though. As I always say, we'll see.
If anyone is interested, I'm posting a widget for my Etsy store on this blog. I'll have a few readings up soon for purchase so keep watch here on my blog. My next post will be the 100th, so I'm planning to write up something fun and interesting for you guys.
Okay, better get down to business! I'm off.
For a Tarot reading and other types of readings, you can visit my shop, Saphira Blue Tarot, here.
Thursday, January 3, 2013
Yule Giveaway Reading is Done and Posted!
I have no idea why I can never find all of my YouTube videos here on Blogger to post, but I'm putting the link here for everyone to click on
Check out Brittany's Reading (part 1)
Check out the rest of Brittany's Reading (part 2)
I have a feeling this is happening because I have two Google accounts, but they're not linked, so I'm contantly running into problems. I'll find a way to solve this eventually.
Thanks again all for being part of my giveaway- I hope to have another soon!
UPDATE: Here are the videos! I finally found them; I'm sure it has to do with how long ago I uploaded them to my channel.
Check out Brittany's Reading (part 1)
Check out the rest of Brittany's Reading (part 2)
I have a feeling this is happening because I have two Google accounts, but they're not linked, so I'm contantly running into problems. I'll find a way to solve this eventually.
Thanks again all for being part of my giveaway- I hope to have another soon!
UPDATE: Here are the videos! I finally found them; I'm sure it has to do with how long ago I uploaded them to my channel.
Part 1
Part 2
Tuesday, January 1, 2013
One Year And A Full Cold Moon
Just coming out of the December full moon and the last full moon of 2012 has given me some food for thought to reflect upon for last day of (now!) last year. At first I wasn't sure what to write about, but I remembered that this blog is not here just to look pretty; it has the function of being my gateway into the outer world. So I must occasionally write the more hidden aspects of my life out of the shadows and into the light.
As a witch I know and understand that there must be a balance between positives and negatives, and so one must take the good with the bad. 2012 wasn't bad, per se, but it wasn't exactly what I wanted it to be. I learned that what I wanted didn't matter- the Goddess had other plans for me in 2012; she wanted me to understand what I needed, not what I wanted. I can honestly say that she did one heck of a job getting that message out there to me in the last twelve months loud and clear.
That being said, the year 2012 as I experienced it was a roller coaster of emotions, disappointing events, and hard situations. I don't think I would want to relive the entirety of 2012, but certainly some moments I will remember fondly for the rest of my days- and some not so fondly. Definitely not fondly.
This year that has now passed was also a year of change for me and my spirituality, and the changes that I felt in my life also gave rise to deep changes of my inner-self; the dormant part of me came out of hiding and the fear I had felt in the past gave way to anger and some resentment. Not intentional, I assure you, but strong emotions can't be hidden under the surface forever. The time must come when you have to either let go and free yourself, or explode suddenly into nothingness. I did a tad bit of exploding, but nothing major. On the other hand, I did let go of a lot of baggage. Nothing is more freeing that pushing your worries and anxiety off your shoulders without looking back. It was a very hard thing to do and I could not have done it without the help of Hekate. She was looking out for me this year like nobody's business during the times of my inner trials and tribulations. I owe her a good amount of karmic debt for helping through the dark times I went through after the passing of my grandmother up until now.
2012 was also a year for enriching what I've known for so long in my craft. I've been practicing seriously for almost four years now (this coming Ostara will mark the anniversary), and I was feeling all the signs that I needed to step up my game somewhat, so I took a small foray into ceremonial magic. It was very interesting to read about and learn historical facts about its origins, but its not really my cup of tea. I'm a very quiet and introspective person by nature, which does not allow for grand spectacles of circle casting and angel invoking pentagrams, hexagrams, and so forth. I was never so self-conscious as I was doing the Greater Banishing Ritual of the Hexagram. I now know that ceremonial magic and Thelema are not my cup of tea, and possibly out of my league, Witchcraft and magic-wise. I was never into magic that much to begin with, so I'm not too bothered about it. I did, however, enjoy doing the Lesser Banishing Ritual of the Pentagram, and if need be I would certainly do it without any inhibitions whatsoever. There's a good story to go with that, but next time.
In other news, my cold is almost gone and I'm heading back to making Tarot videos post-haste. My channel on YouTube has quickly grown to 13 videos, and I hope this month I can add more in depth and interesting topics here on my blog as well. I'm also thinking about making my blog my unofficial book of shadows. I'm not super keen on the idea, but since starting my blog I've almost totally ignored my BOS. I feel bad about that, because I do enjoy writing about my spiritual experiences and my craft. However being on the shy side does not make it easy for me to put such personal information out there for others to read. But yeah, I'm thinking about it for now.
As a witch I know and understand that there must be a balance between positives and negatives, and so one must take the good with the bad. 2012 wasn't bad, per se, but it wasn't exactly what I wanted it to be. I learned that what I wanted didn't matter- the Goddess had other plans for me in 2012; she wanted me to understand what I needed, not what I wanted. I can honestly say that she did one heck of a job getting that message out there to me in the last twelve months loud and clear.
That being said, the year 2012 as I experienced it was a roller coaster of emotions, disappointing events, and hard situations. I don't think I would want to relive the entirety of 2012, but certainly some moments I will remember fondly for the rest of my days- and some not so fondly. Definitely not fondly.
This year that has now passed was also a year of change for me and my spirituality, and the changes that I felt in my life also gave rise to deep changes of my inner-self; the dormant part of me came out of hiding and the fear I had felt in the past gave way to anger and some resentment. Not intentional, I assure you, but strong emotions can't be hidden under the surface forever. The time must come when you have to either let go and free yourself, or explode suddenly into nothingness. I did a tad bit of exploding, but nothing major. On the other hand, I did let go of a lot of baggage. Nothing is more freeing that pushing your worries and anxiety off your shoulders without looking back. It was a very hard thing to do and I could not have done it without the help of Hekate. She was looking out for me this year like nobody's business during the times of my inner trials and tribulations. I owe her a good amount of karmic debt for helping through the dark times I went through after the passing of my grandmother up until now.
2012 was also a year for enriching what I've known for so long in my craft. I've been practicing seriously for almost four years now (this coming Ostara will mark the anniversary), and I was feeling all the signs that I needed to step up my game somewhat, so I took a small foray into ceremonial magic. It was very interesting to read about and learn historical facts about its origins, but its not really my cup of tea. I'm a very quiet and introspective person by nature, which does not allow for grand spectacles of circle casting and angel invoking pentagrams, hexagrams, and so forth. I was never so self-conscious as I was doing the Greater Banishing Ritual of the Hexagram. I now know that ceremonial magic and Thelema are not my cup of tea, and possibly out of my league, Witchcraft and magic-wise. I was never into magic that much to begin with, so I'm not too bothered about it. I did, however, enjoy doing the Lesser Banishing Ritual of the Pentagram, and if need be I would certainly do it without any inhibitions whatsoever. There's a good story to go with that, but next time.
In other news, my cold is almost gone and I'm heading back to making Tarot videos post-haste. My channel on YouTube has quickly grown to 13 videos, and I hope this month I can add more in depth and interesting topics here on my blog as well. I'm also thinking about making my blog my unofficial book of shadows. I'm not super keen on the idea, but since starting my blog I've almost totally ignored my BOS. I feel bad about that, because I do enjoy writing about my spiritual experiences and my craft. However being on the shy side does not make it easy for me to put such personal information out there for others to read. But yeah, I'm thinking about it for now.
It's Finally Here...2013
Should old acquaintance be forgot, and never brought to mind ?
Should old acquaintance be forgot, and old lang syne ?
Never.
HAPPY NEW YEAR EVERYONE!!!
HERE'S TO A JOYOUS AND BLESSED 2013
MAY ALL YOUR WISHES AND HOPES BE GRANTED
WITH NEW FRIENDS AND FUN IN ABUNDANCE
Love you all xoxox
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